Oh! Can you feel it?? The antisipantion? For sulfure, blankets, bright lights and children screaming in races through the multi colored quilt on the ground. It's that time again. For fireworks and bar-b-ques. For family coming together and parades.
Yesterday my husband and I were helping a man push his broken down car through our small town where the speed limit is 25mph. A bunch of cars were driving too fast and one came close to my son and I as we were walking back to our car. Me in my infinite wisdom started ranting about the stupid people saying, "What are people thinking? Were going to celebrate our independance by getting drunk and killing eachother." I would have gone on about the stupidity of this but my husband turned to me and said "Well, that's how it started." . We just laughed. There's too much truth there.
That little moment of my flippant ranting brought me to thinking about everyone that has come before us and what this day really means to me. I know exactly what we're suppost to be celebrateing, but mostly, we celebrate the fireworks and those of us lucky enough, a three day weekend. It gives us excuses for beer and lots of friends, for parties and blowing stuff up. Sounds like a good holiday to me.
But what about where it came from? What about all the people that died so we could have beer and parties? What about all the times we take for granted that being American means we can?
I know that as Americans we have a special day jsut to recignize the people that have died serving our country. But usually, I think of veitnam or the current war. I usually don't think all the way back to independance day. My fault but I have never really thought about it before.
I think the America we see today is a total bastardization of what it was ment to be. I think if our founding fathers could come back now we'd have another war on our hands and once again it's be for independance. But we would be fighting our own leaders this time. Not some distant crown. We'd be fighting Bush. There's no way they would stand for any of this. I think that alot of them would cry in shame at what we have become.
While we are content to shop in our malls and look at Mtv. We watch reality shows and "live war coverage" on CNN. We think what a shame but out of sight out of mind. I had friends in the war, they went and came back and went again and came back changed. Diffrent, and jaded. Most of the guys that I knew that went didn't even believe in the war, they went because it was thier duty. To have such conviction! I want to feel that way about something.
The President says I don't like these people and am going to lie to you to get you to blow them up. And we say "Oh thank you! Yes we'd love that!" Going along our merry freaking way never blinking. Even the ones that got upset really didn't do anything. While President Clinton lies about cheating on his wife. And is almost impeached. LEt me say these two things on Clinton. One, It's good to know that he's getting some. Two, You lie when you're cheating on your wife! THAT"S WHAT YOU DO! It was wrong but that's just what you do.
K, back on topic. We sit around our country never even thinking that anyone can hurt us. Because in truth to the mass populous nobody can. I had friends in 9-11 too so don't get your panties in a wad. Yes, that sucked! But waht have we done about it? Gone after people that had nothing to do with it and then expect them not to think we were terrorist.
"Oh but we're helping them onto a better life." Yea, I'll bet. I life jsut like ours. That's not better, that's jsut us. Go ahead and lose your true culture in what we think is right. Kind of play at what was once sarcred to your people. Yup, sounds like a plan to me.
"But they're fighting our soliders!" OF COURSE THEY ARE! WE're the terrorist here! And we sit in our country celebrateing the independance to do take away someones culture on a stupid vendeta that Bush has. No thank you!
Tonight, I am going to be laying on a couch watching movies and celebrateing my right to say this is Bullshit. We are not the country we once were and you never know, mabey one day we'll be as bad as the Germans, takeing everything they have away from the people. Or the Russians for that matter. Hell, why don't we all jsut move to Canada. But it's getting jsut as bad there.
Independance day! Pish posh! We're celebrateing our malls and money hungry culture. Not me. For once in my life, I'm going to give up the fireworks and parties. Just to sit, with one voice, and say nope, that's not the truth. Because, once, one voice ment something. Now it means nothing.
Once, A voice, just one, could bring about change. Now we have this stupid fileing systemand tons of people get up and can say nothing and it's suppost to mean something to the average person. We're waiting, and that's the problem. We're waiting for a leader. Not a supposed one like Bush, but someone to rise out of the ashes of the shit of this country and say "This is wrong! We're not going to put up with it anymore."
Since I was a child I have had dreams about my death. There's one that has always come back. Over and over, everything is the same. It's about a war. A war for independance. But we're fighting our government. We're fighting on American soil. As a child I put the dream to nightmare and didn't think much of it. In fact I really didn't think much of it until I went to Seattle. The streets the harbor, everything was there. In my dreams. Things were a bit diffrent, but good lord! Can you imagine the shock of someone never having been to this city before knowing the way to he harbor? And for you people that know Seattle, No, I didn't just head down. My friends followed me at a dead run going in and out of streets and alleys. I knew where I was going and fell down and cried like a child when I had found the harbor. I was 19. I got up awhile later and walked slowly to the place where I died and cried again.
Well, in light of the day and my blog. I jsut got a call and my Granfather is in the hostipital. I have to go with this unfinished. I hope enough is said to make you think. Watch and wait. Mabey the "Leader" we are looking for is looking for us."